Today was probably the worst day of back pain since it started. Until i hurt it the second time it was much better and by a few days of sleeping on the heating pad it was better already. Its taking a little longer this time. This time the pain is more in the leg than anything else, sort of alarming. I think a few days in the Caribbean and the massage my parents got me will help. The cold weather up here cant make things any better also.
I'm really excited about the cruise, its my favorite week to 10 days of the entire year. I've never been with anyone while im on the cruise though. I would never think of doing anything now but its different, i have something that will draw me back to life on land. I usually never want to get off the boat but things are different now.
I don't really know what to write about on here yet, I dont really know why I am doing this to be perfectly honest, I was told to just write about whatever crosses my mind basically.
I'm laying in bed now as i write this which is where i do most of my thinking so i guess i have alot crossing my mind but cant get it into words. I dont know.
Everything from the final i have tomorrow that i didnt really study for, to my girlfriend, to my parents, my room mate who is still up studying. My bed is usually where i do most of my deep thinking, nothin too serious now, things are going pretty well right now, not really worried about anything. I got all of my work done so I can have a nice relaxing weekend at home.
I was really worried today when I had to tell my girlfriend i couldnt see her one day this weekend but i think it will work out so that i can even for a little bit that day. I'm on cloud nine right now with her, things are amazing, i only worry sometimes that what i do for her isnt as good as what she does for me, she is really amazing to me and sometimes i feel like i dont always show it back to her, she calls me on it sometimes, i know shes wrong but she points out things to me and i usually understand where shes coming from pretty quickly. It makes me think alot more about my actions and decisions at that time. I've said the whole time that she challenges me to be a better person, intellectually and personally? mentally? i dont know what the right word is.
I really cant complain about my mom right now, she told me what i wanted to hear today, and things with my room mates are much much better. My room mate is contemplating journying into the world of adderall, i sorta want him to try it because he's never done anything like that and i want to be responsible for encouraging him. Does that make me sick? i think it would be entertaining watching him on adderall. Or maybe i'm glad that i'm actually ahead of things for a change. Its sort of a nice feeling, but not one that i'm used to. Anyway, i'm out of ramblings for the night.
Goodnight, (insert catchy advice phrase here)
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